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To the uninitiated, the exhaustive possibilites of glittering pendants and charms will seem daunting. But no fear! Dr Charlton DeRyan is on hand to aid all aspiring gangsters with integral fashion choices. 

The sensitive young man faces many challenges, not least the pinpoint precision needed to navigate the highly prejudiced world of couture. Combine this with the already monumental task facing the aspiring gangster, and our struggling heroes (that’s you, sensitive souls) are most probably gibbering wrecks, shivering under a wholesale pile of 2011 style, bejewelled superman necklaces.

‘Last Year’ – Anachronistic couture

In this article, we will establish the basics of Urban Couture, with parallel psychoanalytic explanations of how these accessories underpin the integrity of the sensitive young man.

This article is sponsored by, the leading wholesale importers of Urban Accessories. Minimum order of $300. 

Gold! Always believe in your soul!

Nothing says gangster like gold. Nothing. A staple not just of ganster attire, gold has been popular since the emergence of the Aztec Empire roughly 3000 years ago. Hip-Hop music of the gangster persuasion has long held this ancient culture in high esteem, reflected by the widespread success and popularity of acts such as Aztek Escobar and Aztec Tribe. The love of this precious metal goes even further however, with numerous songs devoted to ‘Gold Digging’, the actual process of extracting the mineral ore from the earth.

Mineral Ore Extraction Expert

But why is gold so popular? Whilst your first thought may be to the representation of immense wealth, gold is traditionally worn for its courage promoting properties and the manner it reflects the beauty of one’s eyes. Gold is also the colour of the optimist, an outlook strongly desired by the sensitive young man.

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We’re with you buddy

Dr Charlton DeRyan explores the unusual condition of not being able to recognise faces in the rap community with the help of Tupac et al. in their 1996 release All about U (you).       

Who? Prosopagnosia in the rap community      

In 1996, an astounding coincidence occurred. Four friends, Tupac Shakur, Nate Dogg, YGD Tha Top Dogg and Snoop Dogg, discovered that they all suffered from the same condition: the rare prosopagnosia.      

Prosopagnosia is a congenital or acquired mental disorder resulting in the inability to distinguish between faces. For the seriously affected, no facial features at all will be identifiable — not even teeth grills or tattoos of tears. This has obvious impacts on social life, making interactions considerably harder, especially for the emotionally immature.      

completely unrecognisable


It affects approximately 2.5% of the population in it’s mild form, and considerably fewer still suffer with greater severity, so the chance of four best friends finding they were all struck with extreme prosopagnosia is astronomical. Read the rest of this entry »

Dr Charlton DeRyan digs deeper into Earl Simmons’ fourth studio album in search of hidden meanings to illuminate the uninformed.

Pull out: DMX on anachronistic contraception

DMX’s album the Great Depression was a remarkably prescient work, predicting the economic troubles nearing the end of this millennium’s first decade. Past it’s hard hitting, doom saying financial analysis, however, it contained an easy to ignore album skit concerning the rap artist’s honest view of coitus interruptus.

For the younger or less sexually aware readers, coitus interruptus can be thought of as the contraceptive equivalent of playing dodge the train: fine if performed correctly, but if timing is late or you lose your nerve and freeze, you’re wishing you had played it safer. If you’re still unsure, go down to your local sperm donation centre — they’ll explain it with their helpful (and extensive) blue literature libraries.

This ancient practice is now erring on the side of anachronistic contraception, viewed by many as unreliable. Combined with the fact it fails to protect from STD contraction, it’s use has been in steady decline for two millennia. Read the rest of this entry »

A Robert Kelly relationship analysis: insecurities, control struggle and the true meaning of ‘Real Talk’

As sensitive young men, we are often concerned about the welfare of others, especially their emotional well being. Whether this is a moral obligation for the more empathetic among us is not for debate here. Instead we are here to offer our unconditional support to one of our spirit brethren, Robert Kelly, the rhythm and blues star.

The subtle tones and harmonies of his R&B stylings are very pleasing to many SPOCSYM subscribers, but the content is too often on subjects well outside of our comfort zones. The mere fact that in the seminal Ignition: Remix, Robert says The way you do the things you do reminds me of my Lexus Coupé, belies exceptionally alien frames of reference; I can literally think of no time when I’ve favourably compared a woman to a car.

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